If I Ever Could I Would

I fell in love with this world - its brilliant and vibrant sounds, resounding in the life around, so vivid, so colorful, so precise and yet full of mystery, filled with surprises, at times predictable and yet with unforeseen turns, that can break my heart, make the head spin, loose my breath...

If I ever had a chance again to go back to the many instances of moments lost in my indecisiveness, if I ever could redeem the opportunities I deemed far of my reach, if I could ever get a chance to once again walk in that field - then I would- walk as if it was the sacred soil, would fill my lungs with the air of that moment and I would soak up the every little bit of sound that surrounded me that beautiful summer evening, right before the sun kissed the sky its last goodbye for the night, spilling its red and orange and purple over the green hills.

If I ever could I would, talk over that last conversation that we had unfinished; not because I want to prove that I had a point and it was best, but because you matter to me;

If I ever could I would...

Of The Past

She could not think but of the days that have passed and hid behind the curtains, where memories seem to be so vague, not clear who was right, whose fault it was of the broken world, pieces of which she still holds dear to her heart.

It did not matter then - because what made sense were the days she could relate, belonged and felt secure. In those memories was her unshaken world where many dreams looked possible, her aspirations achievable and heart in love, it was so simple, so tangible, so real.

She believed she could shelter a thousand after the war, could feed dozens of hungry, comfort orphaned and make smile an outcast.