I might have distorted my anthropological inheritance, blown away all academic expectations and simply hurt a lady while trying to protect my baby.
It has been awhile now but I still cannot get used to and cannot appreciate one "cultural feature" of people touching baby's cheeks. I guess I would not protest so much but I have a baby! And similar to this I have conversations:
Before the lady ready to stretch her hand to my precious baby I say, with a smile,
"Would you please, not touch baby's face?"
A little taken aback, "We also wash our hands!".
"Yes, I know, - pushing my way, "but coming from the outside and touching baby's face is not good." - I am trying to smile while my baby frowns at the lady.
"What, you don't touch anything?" - persists the stranger.
"I do, but I don't touch baby's face or I wash my hands before I do it." ("After all he is my baby", I think to myself) "Please, don't feel bad," I ask, in a hope that the stranger wont become our enemy.
"Okay." And she turns away with no smile, no bye.
And we walk back home. A little bit sad because we did not want to fight and we like when people smile.
But it becomes tiring to explain to a waitress that she cannot put her finger into my baby's mouth, tell the auto driver to mind his business driving, and not wipe his hands on baby's cheeks and give explanations to tens of other intrinsically good strangers that cheeks also get irritated and baby gets scared of their touch.
We don't bite but we will appreciate your smile and simple inquiry about the name and how we are doing.
It has been awhile now but I still cannot get used to and cannot appreciate one "cultural feature" of people touching baby's cheeks. I guess I would not protest so much but I have a baby! And similar to this I have conversations:
Before the lady ready to stretch her hand to my precious baby I say, with a smile,
"Would you please, not touch baby's face?"
A little taken aback, "We also wash our hands!".
"Yes, I know, - pushing my way, "but coming from the outside and touching baby's face is not good." - I am trying to smile while my baby frowns at the lady.
"What, you don't touch anything?" - persists the stranger.
"I do, but I don't touch baby's face or I wash my hands before I do it." ("After all he is my baby", I think to myself) "Please, don't feel bad," I ask, in a hope that the stranger wont become our enemy.
"Okay." And she turns away with no smile, no bye.
And we walk back home. A little bit sad because we did not want to fight and we like when people smile.
But it becomes tiring to explain to a waitress that she cannot put her finger into my baby's mouth, tell the auto driver to mind his business driving, and not wipe his hands on baby's cheeks and give explanations to tens of other intrinsically good strangers that cheeks also get irritated and baby gets scared of their touch.
We don't bite but we will appreciate your smile and simple inquiry about the name and how we are doing.
3 comments:
:) don't worry this phase passes quickly enough
Alyona,
I understand you very well. We've experienced "touching baby cheeks" last summer in Istanbul. Huh!
The second thing that drives me mad is, people ask how old my baby is and when they get the answer: "He is big for his age". I used to think, "babies are not dolls, they don't have standard size" and just smile not to hurt the STRANGER.
best wishes and love,
Gulmira
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